## Highlights - Speaker 0: that bigger house and a new neighborhood, suddenly we notice our neighbors have houses that are might be even nicer than ours or drive cars that are nicer than ours. So their social comparisons change, which also lead us to kind of want even more. So again, the bottom line is hedonic adaptation leads us to kind of want even more than we have. So, so we never quite satisfied. Speaker 1: Um and the idea of the treadmill of course, is that you're walking, but it feels like you're staying in place. In fact, you've moved up in the world, but it feels emotionally, it feels like, you know, you are where you Speaker 0: used to be, right, right? So they don't a treadmill is kind of like you're getting more stuff, you're getting more goals accomplished, but then you want even more than that, so you don't feel like you're any happier. And again, getting back to sort of evolutionary theory, you could argue that this is really good, this is [(Time 0:17:27)](https://www.airr.io/quote/63e83794d9955ff771163de6) - notes:: Hedonic treadmill - Speaker 1: some of the employees at google about how much they were appreciating. You know, the things that they got to the company, What did people tell Speaker 0: you? Yeah, it's fun. It was really cool. People brought their pets to work and I had game rooms and they had like music rooms with guitars and drums and all kinds of snacks everywhere and and really great food and people were like, oh the crab cakes again, you know, so they were already had adapted right? And partly, you know, they don't go visit like other workplaces. You know, one of my sort of advice is like we'll go visit other workplaces. So you can kind of see that you have it better than others. Um, but yeah, we just adapt so quickly. It's amazing to me. Speaker 1: So I want to talk about these twin enemies. One is sort of a resentment about what we [(Time 0:20:13)](https://www.airr.io/quote/63e83c7dd9955ff77116c4f4) - notes:: Will you adopt quicker to positive and happy things can we do to negative things so due to the hedonic treadmill, you will become accustomed to and adapt to something positive in your life, but it will take longer to adapt to something negative in your life - Speaker 1: you can better appreciate what it is that you have Speaker 0: or that company should just like throw a fire hose of goodies at you every day but somehow limit them. And you know, intermittently kind of sprinkled them. You know like crab cakes only, you know on special days, right? Not every day, Speaker 1: but isn't it ironic sonia that the impulse that we have, you know, when something gives us pleasure, we want more of it. And in some ways it's almost counterintuitive to say that we actually want to hold this pleasurable thing at bay to some extent, in order to draw out the happiness we can derive Speaker 0: from it. Exactly. Another example is a new relationship where you become more and more intimate, like you kind of reveal more and more of yourself to the other person and it's so pleasurable, right? Because [(Time 0:41:33)](https://www.airr.io/quote/63e84182d9955ff771175807) - notes:: This reminds me of the advice from stoicism to not feel happiness too strongly, and in the same vein to not let unhappiness affect you strongly, either experience, everything with equanimity --- tags: 📥️/🎧️/🟥️ publish: true aliases: - Where Happiness Hides cover: '' general_subject: specific_subject: source: airr isbn: doi: url: 'https://www.airr.io/episode/61365f32b42f5c000f2bcf42' author: "[[@Hidden Brain]]" guest: publish_date: reviewed_date: ---  ## Highlights - Speaker 0: that bigger house and a new neighborhood, suddenly we notice our neighbors have houses that are might be even nicer than ours or drive cars that are nicer than ours. So their social comparisons change, which also lead us to kind of want even more. So again, the bottom line is hedonic adaptation leads us to kind of want even more than we have. So, so we never quite satisfied. Speaker 1: Um and the idea of the treadmill of course, is that you're walking, but it feels like you're staying in place. In fact, you've moved up in the world, but it feels emotionally, it feels like, you know, you are where you Speaker 0: used to be, right, right? So they don't a treadmill is kind of like you're getting more stuff, you're getting more goals accomplished, but then you want even more than that, so you don't feel like you're any happier. And again, getting back to sort of evolutionary theory, you could argue that this is really good, this is [(Time 0:17:27)](https://www.airr.io/quote/63e83794d9955ff771163de6) - notes:: Hedonic treadmill - Speaker 1: some of the employees at google about how much they were appreciating. You know, the things that they got to the company, What did people tell Speaker 0: you? Yeah, it's fun. It was really cool. People brought their pets to work and I had game rooms and they had like music rooms with guitars and drums and all kinds of snacks everywhere and and really great food and people were like, oh the crab cakes again, you know, so they were already had adapted right? And partly, you know, they don't go visit like other workplaces. You know, one of my sort of advice is like we'll go visit other workplaces. So you can kind of see that you have it better than others. Um, but yeah, we just adapt so quickly. It's amazing to me. Speaker 1: So I want to talk about these twin enemies. One is sort of a resentment about what we [(Time 0:20:13)](https://www.airr.io/quote/63e83c7dd9955ff77116c4f4) - notes:: Will you adopt quicker to positive and happy things can we do to negative things so due to the hedonic treadmill, you will become accustomed to and adapt to something positive in your life, but it will take longer to adapt to something negative in your life - Speaker 1: you can better appreciate what it is that you have Speaker 0: or that company should just like throw a fire hose of goodies at you every day but somehow limit them. And you know, intermittently kind of sprinkled them. You know like crab cakes only, you know on special days, right? Not every day, Speaker 1: but isn't it ironic sonia that the impulse that we have, you know, when something gives us pleasure, we want more of it. And in some ways it's almost counterintuitive to say that we actually want to hold this pleasurable thing at bay to some extent, in order to draw out the happiness we can derive Speaker 0: from it. Exactly. Another example is a new relationship where you become more and more intimate, like you kind of reveal more and more of yourself to the other person and it's so pleasurable, right? Because [(Time 0:41:33)](https://www.airr.io/quote/63e84182d9955ff771175807) - notes:: This reminds me of the advice from stoicism to not feel happiness too strongly, and in the same vein to not let unhappiness affect you strongly, either experience, everything with equanimity --- tags: 📥️/🎧️/🟥️ publish: true aliases: - Where Happiness Hides cover: '' general_subject: specific_subject: source: airr isbn: doi: url: 'https://www.airr.io/episode/61365f32b42f5c000f2bcf42' author: "[[@Hidden Brain]]" guest: publish_date: reviewed_date: ---  ## Highlights - Speaker 0: that bigger house and a new neighborhood, suddenly we notice our neighbors have houses that are might be even nicer than ours or drive cars that are nicer than ours. So their social comparisons change, which also lead us to kind of want even more. So again, the bottom line is hedonic adaptation leads us to kind of want even more than we have. So, so we never quite satisfied. Speaker 1: Um and the idea of the treadmill of course, is that you're walking, but it feels like you're staying in place. In fact, you've moved up in the world, but it feels emotionally, it feels like, you know, you are where you Speaker 0: used to be, right, right? So they don't a treadmill is kind of like you're getting more stuff, you're getting more goals accomplished, but then you want even more than that, so you don't feel like you're any happier. And again, getting back to sort of evolutionary theory, you could argue that this is really good, this is [(Time 0:17:27)](https://www.airr.io/quote/63e83794d9955ff771163de6) - notes:: Hedonic treadmill - Speaker 1: some of the employees at google about how much they were appreciating. You know, the things that they got to the company, What did people tell Speaker 0: you? Yeah, it's fun. It was really cool. People brought their pets to work and I had game rooms and they had like music rooms with guitars and drums and all kinds of snacks everywhere and and really great food and people were like, oh the crab cakes again, you know, so they were already had adapted right? And partly, you know, they don't go visit like other workplaces. You know, one of my sort of advice is like we'll go visit other workplaces. So you can kind of see that you have it better than others. Um, but yeah, we just adapt so quickly. It's amazing to me. Speaker 1: So I want to talk about these twin enemies. One is sort of a resentment about what we [(Time 0:20:13)](https://www.airr.io/quote/63e83c7dd9955ff77116c4f4) - notes:: Will you adopt quicker to positive and happy things can we do to negative things so due to the hedonic treadmill, you will become accustomed to and adapt to something positive in your life, but it will take longer to adapt to something negative in your life - Speaker 1: you can better appreciate what it is that you have Speaker 0: or that company should just like throw a fire hose of goodies at you every day but somehow limit them. And you know, intermittently kind of sprinkled them. You know like crab cakes only, you know on special days, right? Not every day, Speaker 1: but isn't it ironic sonia that the impulse that we have, you know, when something gives us pleasure, we want more of it. And in some ways it's almost counterintuitive to say that we actually want to hold this pleasurable thing at bay to some extent, in order to draw out the happiness we can derive Speaker 0: from it. Exactly. Another example is a new relationship where you become more and more intimate, like you kind of reveal more and more of yourself to the other person and it's so pleasurable, right? Because [(Time 0:41:33)](https://www.airr.io/quote/63e84182d9955ff771175807) - notes:: This reminds me of the advice from stoicism to not feel happiness too strongly, and in the same vein to not let unhappiness affect you strongly, either experience, everything with equanimity